Part 3
Title:: From Death
Pairing:: Severus/Harry
Chapter:: 3/3
Rating:: Hard R/NC-17 (I'm never sure between R and NC17) for this chapter.
Summary:: What happens when Harry Potter and Severus Snape meet in Limbo? When Harry lives through his near death experience he seeks answers from those thought to be long since passed.
Spoilers:: DH though I'm sure by now everyone has read it or has been spoiled.
A/N:: Not as angsty as I wanted but whatever. Part three, and last bit of the fic. It didn't even really go how I wanted it, but I think I like it anyway. :)

And a huge thanks to nevereverposts for helping me with some plot issues like dittany and such. *squish*

chapter one
chapter two


Harry waited all of twelve hours before tromping back to Snape’s shop. It was empty and through the window he could see Snape behind the counter, reading an inventory list. Harry entered the shop and ignored Snape’s eye roll when he spotted Harry.

"I suppose I don’t need to ask why you’re back," Snape said, looking back down at his list. "After all, you’re a Potter. Can’t seem to let anything go, ever."

Harry approached the counter and rested an arm on the top. "I just want you to answer one question for me."

Snape sighed. "You’re going to ask me if I fancy men."

Harry’s eyes widened. "How’d-?"

"Because, Potter, if you recall, not only was I your professor for five years, but you are annoyingly like your mother, who would have demanded the same thing from me, had she been in your shoes." Snape paused and then added, "She caught your stupid father snogging Sirius once, just after James had asked her to be his girlfriend, and she cornered him to demand if he liked women at all. I happened to be in the corridor at that particular moment."

"Ah," Harry said. He could have said something else, a comment on how Snape stalked his mum, but he let it go. "So?"

"I shouldn’t answer you, Potter," Snape said. He no longer sounded snarky, just annoyed.

"Humour me."

"Why do you think you deserve to be humoured by me?" Snape demanded. "What makes you think you even deserve my time that you’re currently wasting?"

"Goddamn it!" Harry hissed.

Snape slammed the inventory list down. "Oh fucking christ, Potter," he snarled. "Yes. I swing both ways. But I don’t swing your way, Potter."

"Why not?"

"Well possibly because I was a legal adult at the time of your birth," he said. "Just for starters."

"I refuse to accept that answer."

"You can’t refuse to accept my answer," Snape said, pointing a long finger in Harry’s face. "I don’t fancy you."

"I think you’re a liar," Harry said, batting Snape’s hand away and crossing his arms.

"The more you act like a child, the less I want you." That little slip caused Snape to groan and Harry’s eyes to develop an annoying glint.

"Less?"

"I meant-"

"I know what you meant," Harry said. "Meet me for drinks tonight. If we can get through the whole night without even a little snog, I swear I will never bother you again."

"That could be too much to hope for," Snape muttered.

"Is that a yes?"

Snape said nothing, but his answer was clear. Harry bounded out of the shop with promises to meet Snape back there at closing.

---- ---- ---

Anxious and true to his word, Harry arrived just as Snape was locking up. He wore Muggle attire and quickly ushered Snape a few blocks down the street to a smallish little venue that was quiet, though not empty. They secured a spot in the back, ordered drinks and Harry spent the first part of the night simply staring at Snape.

"If you keep this up," Snape said, on his fourth scotch, "I’m liable to send you home without eyeballs."

Harry smiled and looked away. "I can’t help it. It’s just strange to look at you and remember the things I used to think the last time I saw you."

"I don’t want to know," Snape said miserably.

"Yeah, you probably don’t," Harry said with a laugh. "But I am hoping to show you one day."

"It will never happen," Snape said firmly.

Harry downed the rest of his drink and feeling that common drunken boldness, he leant across the table and kissed Snape. It was quick and tight lipped but it made them both gasp for breath.

"You son of a bitch," Snape hissed.

Harry was about to retort but Snape grabbed the collar of his shirt and snogged him proper. When they parted, Harry sat back, red in the face, and Snape stood, rushing out of the pub. It only took a nanosecond for Harry to gather together his bearings and follow Snape outside.

Harry caught up with the older man, grabbed his arm and pulled him into a quiet, dark alley. "What the hell was that, Snape?"

"Whatever it was, it would be best if you forgot about it," Snape said. He looked like he was about to be ill.

"That kiss didn’t just come out of nowhere," Harry protested.

"Perhaps not, but this conversation is going nowhere," Snape retorted. "Fuck off, Potter, for my sake and yours."

Harry shoved Snape against the wall angrily and drew his wand. "I won’t just fuck off," he spat.

"Of course not, why would you do anything the easy way," Snape bit out. He flicked the tip of the wand and sneered at Harry. "What do you want, Potter? A courtesy fuck? Another snog before the two of us go back to our quiet lives?"

"You’re a bastard," Harry said miserably, dropping his wand.

"You act as though you didn’t know that before you sought me out. And if you’ll recall," Snape added, "you sought me out. I knew you were alive this entire time and had no desire to find you and claim you."

"I was married before this," Harry said.

Snape laughed harshly. "As though that would have stopped you if I’d shown up at your door."

Harry didn’t speak; he knew Snape was right. "So you’re going to snog me and then walk away and go back to your life, pretending I don’t exist."

"I’ve never spent a day, since your birth, able to pretend you didn't exist, Potter," Snape said.

Harry boldly leant forward and kissed Snape again. It lasted longer this time, Snape’s hands coming up to tangle in Harry’s messy locks. They pressed up against the wall, bodies moulded together so tight they could almost fuck through their clothes. Harry’s fingers were twisted in the sleeve of Snape’s thick jumper and Snape’s fingers were pulling painfully at Harry’s hair.

"Get off me," Snape said against Harry’s mouth, but made no attempt to push Harry away.

Their tongues continued to tangle, their erections grew harder and their breathing grew more erratic. "My flat is close," Harry whispered. He didn’t wait for Snape’s answer, merely grabbed onto him tightly and Apparated away.

They barely separated long enough to remove clothing and before either man could breathe properly, they were on the bed and Snape was in Harry. Harry lay on the bed, his head pressed into the duvet and he was crying out. It hurt, a lot. It had been a long time since he’d taken it that way and Snape was none too kind. He didn’t even bother to finish Harry off; just shuddered atop the younger man and came. Of course Harry was close enough that it only took seconds of his own hand to reach his own orgasm and when he had recovered it, Snape was already half dressed.

"I’d better not be far from my home," was the only thing Snape said before he walked out of Harry’s apartment and down to the street.

Of course, Harry hadn’t expected him to stay, and really didn’t even expect a thank you. He was out of breath, in pain, but felt better than he had in many, many years.

---- — ---

When Harry woke the next day, he went straight to Snape’s shop. The shop was open and an elderly woman was behind the counter. Frowning, Harry approached and tried to sound as casual as possible. "Is the shop owner in today?"

The woman smiled kindly. "He’s gone to deal with a couple of our inventory issues and I’m not sure when he’ll be back. Is there something I can help you with?"

"No," Harry said slowly. "Er... I’ll go ahead and pop back in later."

"Would you like me to tell him you stopped by?"

Harry almost laughed. "No, thank you."

"Well if there’s anything I can do for you let me know," she said. Harry nodded and started to walk away when the woman called out, "Oh, well you know, his wife is here. Do you think she might be able to answer your questions?"

Harry’s blood ran cold and he turned around slowly. "His wife?"

"Yes. She’s just upstairs. I can fetch her if you’d like."

"No," Harry said with a sad smile. "I’ll just see myself out. You’ve been a tremendous help though." Harry hurried for the door, but to his complete horror, as he was reaching for the handle, Snape walked in.

"You," he muttered.

"And you," Harry said with a twisted smile. "Tell that woman behind the counter I said I owe her one. Have a fantastic life, Snape." Harry shoved past Snape and broke into a run when he hit the street. He didn’t stop until he reached the stairs to his flat.

He planned on running inside and locking himself away but unfortunately Hermione was standing by the door, pushing his buzzer. She smiled at him when he approached. "I thought you were ignoring me," she said. "I was just about to let myself in."

Harry gave her a tight smile. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, part of me was curious to see how it went with Snape," she said as Harry opened the door with his key. "And also I’ve a note from Ginny."

Harry groaned loudly, the weight of the day growing heavier and heavier. "What does she want?"

"You need to take Lily this weekend," Hermione said. "Ginny and Ivan are off on holiday. She did tell you that last month, didn’t she?"

"Uh... yeah, she did," Harry said absently as he let them into his flat.

Hermione studied Harry for some time. "What’s going on with you?" she asked. "Ron’s been making your excuses at work and I, of course, thought it had something to do with Snape, but you seem really off."

Harry sighed, flopped down onto his sofa and spilt the entire story in one go, right down to the last detail.

Hermione crossed her arms and sighed. "I’m sorry Harry, I really am. But then again, it’s not like he was waiting for you or anything."

"I know that," Harry snapped. "I just didn’t think he’d fuck me and then go home to his wife, okay? I wouldn’t have done that to Ginny."

"You wouldn’t have?" Hermione challenged. "Even if it were with Snape."

"Even if it were with Snape," Harry said firmly, though he only half believed himself. "Besides, it’s like you said, he wasn’t waiting for me or anything. The last time he saw me, as he so kindly put it, I was an annoying teenager."

"I’m not sure what to tell you, Harry," Hermione said gently.

"I don’t need you to tell me anything. I just need some time."

"Fair enough," Hermione said. "Do you want Ron and me to take Lily? I’m sure Hugo would love to have her over. He’s been so bored with his sister away at school."

"Maybe for a night or two," Harry said, "but it’ll be a good distraction to have her around."

"If you need anything," Hermione said starting for the door.

"I know how to reach you," Harry said. When Hermione was gone, Harry buried his head under the sofa pillow and decided he was not going to get up for as long as he could manage.

— — —

After three days, Harry had to get up, whether he wanted to or not. He had to pick up Lily from Ginny and her new husband Ivan’s house. Before leaving, Harry took a quick shower, thanked God for his magical ability and spelled his flat clean and made sure everything in Lily’s room was in order. He made a mental note to stop off at a supermarket before they got home and he headed for the door.

Harry took the steps down slowly, still feeling rather depressed and walked outside. The very last thing he expected, of course, was to see Severus Snape leaning against the building. Harry stopped and stared at him for a long time before speaking.

"Have you been here all week?" he asked.

Snape let out a snort. "Not bloody likely. I simply know you well enough to know you’d emerge after three days."

"Fan-fucking-tastic," Harry muttered and started down the street.

"In such a hurry, Potter?" Snape asked as he kept pace easily.

"I have a life, though you may not think so," Harry said as he tried to quicken his steps. "What the hell do you want, anyway?" Harry paused at the cub and hailed a cab, quickly slipping inside. He wasn’t surprised when Snape slid into the seat next to him and shut the door. Harry gave the driver Ginny’s address and they sped off.

"It took me a while to figure out why you left the way you did. Elizabeth didn’t mention she’d told you about Kate until yesterday."

"Kate is your wife?" Harry asked.

"Ex wife," Severus corrected.

"She called her your wife," Harry said bitterly.

"Yes, well, Elizabeth was always against the divorce. Kate and I have a daughter and Elizabeth doesn’t believe in divorce if children are involved."

"Really?" Harry asked snidely.

"I’m not a good husband," Snape said with a shrug. "Kate and I lasted as long as we could. I suppose it’s better your mum never did want me."

"Is this supposed to make me feel better?" Harry demanded.

"It’s not always about you, Potter," Snape answered. "I’m merely stating facts to correct your misunderstanding of the situation."

"How old is your kid?" Harry asked.

"Nine," Snape said.

"So is Lily," Harry muttered. "That’s where we’re going, by the way. Ginny’s going to be thrilled to see you, let me tell you."

"To quote you earlier, fan-fucking-tastic," Snape said dryly.

Harry let out a short laugh. "Why were you waiting for me today, Snape? You made it perfectly clear you don’t really want me. I’m not going to hang around and be some booty call."

"What the hell is a booty call?" Snape asked.

Harry shook his head. "A fuck. A casual fuck. I’ve never wanted one of those."

"Did I ask you to be one?" Snape asked harshly. "Did I ask you to be any kind of fuck, Potter? Did I ask you in to my bed, into my life?"

"No, but you certainly didn’t say no when it came down to it," Harry pointed out. "And I know that a man like you doesn’t get bested by his cock when it comes to making decisions."

Snape sighed and looked out the window. "I’m not going to say I’m fighting conscious over you, Potter. I have no qualms about buggering a man your age. I have no qualms about buggering the child of two people I went to school with. Nor do I feel any wrongness over buggering the son of a woman I once loved."

"So what is it, then?" Harry demanded.

"I just wasn’t interested," Snape said plainly.

That stung, badly, and Harry couldn’t look Snape in the face. "If you’d said it like that before I would have given up the first day."

"I tried," Snape argued.

"No, you didn’t. Not like that. You didn’t try very hard at all, actually. You gave in to me every time!"

Snape pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a frustrated growl. "You make everything so fucking difficult."

"I thought I was making it easy, actually," Harry snapped. "I laid it all out on the table for you, told you I’d leave you alone if there was no snogging, which there was, initiated by you, and then I come to find you’re married."

"Divorced, just as you are divorced," Snape hissed.

"Whatever. You should have told me."

"I. Fucking. Tried." Snape bit meanly. "You just refuse to listen, as usual."

"Oh it’s always my fault," Harry snapped. The cab came to a halt and Harry paid the driver. Both men stepped out onto the curb and Harry turned to look at Snape.

"It usually is your fault, Potter, if you’d care to think back on things."

Unfortunately Snape was right, for the most part, and Harry wished he could hex him, or at the very least, punch him in the face. "So what do you want now, Snape? If you came here to convince me to give up on you, you’re wasting your breath. I’ve already done it."

"I know," Snape said. "I’m actually here to see if you might like to try another one of those dates."

Harry’s eyes widened. "What the fuck?"

"The fuck, being the operative word," Snape said. "I didn’t realise just how attracted to you I was until we fucked. I needed to get my head on straight, but you went and acted like your typical Gryffindor self, charging into the situation, and got yourself all turned round, confused and stupid."

"Wow, what a way with words, Snape. Gods, now I really want you," Harry said sarcastically.

Snape was about to speak but Ginny’s front door opened and Lily came bursting out, jumping into her father’s arms. Ginny was soon to follow and found herself gobsmacked, staring at Snape.

"Dare I ask?" she said in a soft voice.

"No," Harry said. His voice always had a bit of an edge to it when he spoke to her. "Unless you’d like to participate in sharing and tell me about the joys of you and Ivan in the bedroom."

Ginny paled. "Can’t say I didn’t expect this day to come."

"Well at least I waited for the divorce," Harry said and reached out for Lily’s rucksack. "You ready to go, kiddo?"

Lily nodded and looked at Snape warily. "Who’s that?" she whispered.

"I’ll explain that later tonight, okay?" Harry whispered back and winked at Snape. "So you’ll be back...?"

"Next weekend," Ginny said. "But if you’re going to have Lily around-"

"Don’t go there," Harry snapped quickly. "Bugger off and enjoy your holiday."

Ginny muttered several foul words under her breath before kissing her daughter goodbye and disappearing back into the house.

Lily kept her eyes fixed on Severus as the three of them climbed into a second cab and headed back towards Harry’s flat. When they arrived back on Harry’s street, Severus remained in the cab. Harry leant his head back in after he’d got his daughter situated and handed Severus a slip of paper.

"I assume you have a telephone. Ring me and we can finish our conversation. I’m assuming you weren’t done." Severus took the paper and crushed it into his fist. "Lily’s going to spend a night with Ron and Hermione, I could make time then."

"I’ll ring you," was all Snape said.

Harry backed out of the cab and watched it pull away. He took just a second to himself before he and Lily headed upstairs, preparing for a weekend without thinking of Severus Snape.

— — —

Harry leant on the railing outside and watched as a few embers from his cigarette floated downward. "Do you regret anything?" he asked.

Severus, who was seated in a chair watching Harry, shook his head. "I’ve never regretted much in my life. There were times I wish I had made different choices but it always ended up working out in my favour... in the end."

Harry laughed. "Same."

"I still wonder how that works for you," Severus said, shaking his head a little. "Perhaps I should try a little bit of reckless Gryffindor stupidity."

"Wouldn’t work for you, Half-blood Prince. You're all Slytherin," Harry said jokingly.

"I hate you," Snape muttered.

Harry leaned over and kissed Snape softly. "No, you don’t." Harry finished the cigarette and they headed back inside. Harry’s flat now looked much different, many of Severus’ things having taken the place where Ginny’s things had once been. There were Muggle and Wizarding photos on the walls and mantle and Harry paused to look at one of Lily and Olivia, Snape's daughter, the day before they went off to Hogwarts.

"Do you think they’ll be writing soon?" Harry mused as they settled on the sofa with tea.

"Probably not," Snape said. "It’s the boys who act like nancies."

Harry wanted to argue but it was mostly true. "Well I, for one, am exhausted."

"I hope not too exhausted," Severus said, plucking the teacup from Harry’s fingers. "I had a few more plans in store for us tonight."

Harry grinned and kissed Snape before saying, "Ah, I think I’ve just got my second wind."